Baby Girl by Lenora Adams

Author:Lenora Adams
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
Published: 2007-03-15T00:00:00+00:00

Dear Ree Ree,

Thank you for finally writing me and letting me know where you are. I was worried.

The morning you left I woke up, saw your door was open, and walked into your room. Although your posters were still on the walls, teddy bears in the same corner of the floor, something was missing.

Yes, I could feel it. As your mother I could feel that your presence was somehow gone, not just temporarily, like you had gone to the store or something, but permanently. When I looked in your closet, I thought a few things were missing, but my suspicions weren’t confirmed until I opened your panty drawer and it was empty and your cash was gone. (Yes, I’ve always known where you hide your money.)

As reality slapped me in the face, panic set in. Where were you? Why did you leave? Were you okay? I tore your bedroom upside down, looking for clues to answer all my damn questions. Nate heard me and came into your room. But he didn’t belong in there, did he? When I looked at him, I realized he didn’t belong in our house, our home, either.

“Just go!” I snapped, pushing him out the front door and slamming the screen.

As soon as he left, I continued searching your room, and finally, tucked inside the change purse of your purple Dooney and Bourke bag, I found it: one stick with a blue stripe.

“Damn, Ree Ree!” I slid onto the floor and grabbed my heart as if my hand could hold the pieces together.

So before I got your letter, I discovered why you left. I hadn’t a clue before that. Yes, I noticed the weight gain, but I thought you were just getting a little fat. That happens to girls as they get older.

I missed the signs this time. But, Ree Ree, I put you on those pills so this wouldn’t happen again! I didn’t want you to have to take my walk. It’s an uphill haul in the dense forest without a compass! Contrary to what you might think, I wanted better for you. I wanted and still want you to have a better life. What mother doesn’t want that for her child? I didn’t want you to have to struggle like I do to make ends meet—hoping that after the bills are paid there’s a little bit of money left over, creatively stretching a dollar and a meal. Ree Ree, it’s hard raising a baby, especially alone—especially at seventeen. I know.

You know I had you when I was fifteen years old. Fifteen! I was still a baby. What the hell did I know about being a mom? Yeah, even back then I had some choices. But I wanted you! I was keeping you. And like you, I blindly thought a baby of my own would just love me. Love me? I thought you would help fill those empty spaces.

Spaces that were created when my daddy walked off and never came back home. When I was ten years old, he left me.

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